Adoptees can struggle in many ways. Beyond complicated emotions around belonging and identity, they may find that their legal identity is also in jeopardy. The citizenship they took for granted growing up sometimes doesn’t exist. This is one of the many types of legal issues that Gregory Luce helps adoptees face. He founded the Adoptee…
Seeing double stripes on a plastic wand can invoke an amazing array of emotions. On the positive side can be happiness, or in some cases, where pregnancy has been a hard-won goal, elation. When plans did not include a baby, mental gears can start churning. Maybe money is tight and there are other mouths to…
Anne Moody did not start her career with a focus on adoption. She grew up in an age when orphan stories were common and superficial. As she got more involved with adoption, facilitating connections between mothers and adoptive families, she saw the trauma, stress, as well as corruption and mishandling of this fragile process. Anne…
I read recently about a girl who found a mentor at her church who became her sounding board and connection to sanity. This relationship continued into adulthood, as she mined her mentor for nuggets of advice based on her lived experience. She even hosted her mentor in Europe when she was living abroad. (1) Mentoring relationships…
Dr. Adam Anthony began life as an adoptee from foster care. After getting his education, he centered on the importance he saw in the relationship of a mentor. He had benefitted from being connected to mentors over the course of his life. Now, armed with his own experience and all he has learned, he seeks…
My relationship with my name has been complicated over the years. The name came to be assigned to me at birth by my mother, who wanted to mash together Charlotte and a piece of her own name. Hence, I have been bestowed a name that requires me to pronounce it three times at each introduction,…
I have thought a lot about coaching and how it can benefit people. For most of my life, I have attempted to come alongside the parents and young adults I have known to help them develop meaningful goals and be their cheerleader through setbacks and successes. Over this time, I have seen how their experiences, especially within their families, have affected this trajectory. If your life has been touched by adoption or foster care, whether you experienced these as a child or a parent, they can change the way you face goals and life. I understand this nuance, not just from my own world, but from years of relationships and research from perspectives outside my own. Let me come alongside you. I will respect your experience and your path and be your cheerleader as we move toward a life you can only imagine.
This course is about how to communicate with our children about adoption in each stage of their lives. I put this course together, not because I am a mental health professional prescribing the appropriate way to parent. I am not. I have immense respect for them and what they are able to do to help keep our kids and ourselves happy and healthy. But I am speaking from my perspective as an adoptive mom with on-the-ground experience. In addition to that, I have also been a podcaster and writer about adoption and foster care issues over the past few years. I have learned from listening to others in the adoption space and doing my own research. Many adoptees have been vocal about the alienation they felt when they couldn’t talk to their parents about important aspects of who they were and how they felt about their adoption. We adoptive parents often don’t know how to navigate these conversations. I hope this course can be a starting point for parents to feel empowered to find out what will work for them and their families to allow them to bring adoption into their regular everyday conversation.
By Charlyn Spiering on July 23
My kids’ most-requested vacation destination happens to be a tiny town in the Midwest where the tourist attraction for them is their aunts, uncles, and cousins. This isn’t always a trip that is emotionally easy for all of us. It is wonderful that all of the kids feel connected to family and proud of their heritage, even my adopted kids. But as much as we want them to, things don’t always go smoothly with any family. There can be times when worldviews clash, when strong personalities make disruptive choices, or when large groups have difficulty making decisions. For adoptees, family times can also be a reminder of the members that are not present. In all the excitement, I find that quiet times for self-care stolen away from the fun can make for valuable memories as well.
Adoption Uncovered 